We bought my big dog, Jake The Dog, a feeding trough. It’s a bench-type food bowl, made just for dogs like him, an 85 pound plus dog, so that they don’t have to bend over and put a strain on the spine to eat out of a traditional food bowl. It’s supposed to be good to use it from the time they are young, so their backs stay strong and healthy as they age. He loves his trough. He goes right to it, scoops up a huge mouthful of food, walks two feet away, tosses the food on the floor, bends over and eats it, then goes back to the trough.
The quietness of the house is proportionate to the damage the teenage boy (Brat Boy) is doing and thinks he’s being sneaky about.
When the Brat Boy yells from upstairs, “I’m okay!” it usually means something else isn’t.
Hearing, “Well, the good news is…” from the Brat Boy means bad news will follow. The bad news that follows is inversely proportionate to the calmness in his voice when he tells me the good news.
The recentness of my cleaning the piss stain off the back of the couch where the little dog marked is in direct proportion to the likelihood that the little dog will piss on it again.
The size of the dog is inversely proportionate to the ferocity of the dog’s bite: Little dogs think they are pit bulls; big dogs whimper like babies. That said, the little dog will sink his teeth into the fur of the big dog, hang on, and get dragged around the house, while the big dog doesn’t even feel it. Ferocious.
The likelihood of your car, that has been making that weird noise for weeks, making that noise when you are at the mechanic is about as likely as winning the lottery when you haven’t purchased a ticket.
The more serious the symptoms you have when you call the doctor for an appointment, the less likely it is the doctor will be able to see you that day. By the time the doctor is able to see you, the symptoms you needed to see the doctor for have likely all gone away. Unfortunately, since it was so hard to get in to see the doctor, you can’t quite bring yourself to cancel the appointment.
The longer you wait to fill your prescription at the pharmacy (that is, when you have run out and have no pills left and need a dose the next day), the more likely it is the pharmacy will be out of the medication and won’t be able to get any in for days. However, when you have just picked up a script for the month, the pharmacy will call you and let you know that your automatic refill is ready to be picked up.
Kids say the darndest things at the darndest moments, but won’t say the one thing you want them to at the right moment. For example, Brat Boy has no problem telling the cop that you were speeding because you were in a hurry to get to a doctor’s appointment you were late for, but when you ask him to verify that you were wearing your seatbelt and only took it off when you reached in the glovebox for your insurance card, he can’t remember if you were wearing it or not. (happened a long time ago… true story…)
Do you have your own personal Murphy’s Laws? Share them in the comments or on your blog and let me know – link to your blog if you do your own! I’ll likely share more later.
Right now, I’m sort of up all night spinning because I’m supposed to be going to the doctor at 10am to get an echocardiogram and EKG to see if I have congestive heart failure, pulmonary hypertension, or superventricular tachycardia… I don’t want any of them, so here’s hoping it’s something simple, that the symptoms are related to a medication I’m taking, and that everything is easily fixable and I will get better and live a long and healthy life once they figure it all out.
In the meantime, I could use some calming energy and prayers to get through the night and the morning… hopefully we’ll get the results immediately. Waiting would be hard — so here’s hoping I won’t have to wait. I mean, I’ll still have the DM/PM, the PGA-II stuff, and all, but you know what… it’s very likely the symptoms I’m having now are just related to the new meds used to treat that and not to a new condition. CHF would be a death sentence, really… so we really don’t want that. I haven’t read enough about SVT, so I don’t know. Scary stuff.
I’ve always said I have a big heart… here’s hoping that it’s just an expression!
Love and stuff,
Michy
PS: Don’t forget to share your personal Murphy’s Laws!
