Today, I felt like snizzle so I slept most of the morning and part of the afternoon. Then I realized my deadline for my most recent book that I finished in the THREE series is due by midnight on the 11th and I was not finished editing or formatting it, so I got busy doing that. The name of that book is THREE: Infidelity.
So instead of worrying over statistics about my chance of dying from a flu=like viral pneumonia, I spent the night finishing the edit on my book and formatting it so it had a working TOC (table of contents). I’m really happy to finally get this book out into the world, birthing it like a really, really past due pregnancy — I could take that analogy and run with it but it gets gross, so I won’t. You’re welcome.
I just uploaded the final version of THREE: Infidelity. It took long enough but now the whole series is together in one place on Amazon. You can pre-order your copy right now to be one of the first to read it or you can pick up the first in the series for free and get back into it. https://amzn.to/38I0brc This is my first finished book since the strokes. I hope I still got it! LOL
What does that mean, exactly? It means I’ve found a way to write in spite of the deficits the strokes caused. It means I didn’t let them win or beat me. It means I’m a survivor and not a victim. It means a whole hell of a lot even if the book sucks, because I did it. I finished it, I edited it and i moved in a positive direction. And it felt almost like starting over. But not quite.
I hope that each book will get easier. I’ve found a position I can type in without much pain. I can’t do it for long at one stretch like I used to but I can do it several times per day perhaps. I won’t be as fast as I was before but maybe if I am more consistent than before I won”t have to be as fast. It’s harder than it was before, but that doesn’t mean I can’t do it. It means I was lucky before and now I’ll just have to learn to slow down and be grateful for what I still have.
I’m not extraordinary anymore but I am far from ordinary. We all have something that makes us special. I’m realizing mine just might be my unwillingness to lay down and give up. I refuse to die. And maybe I need to remember that when the covid stuff starts scaring me. It’s everywhere and it frightens me because I didn’t come this far and go through this much to have a stupid viral pneumonia take me out! I refuse!
It’s everywhere though. It’s all anyone is talking about. It’s all over facebook and the internet and the news and youtube and everywhere. I’m safe right now, but I’m scared. And nobody is talking about how people with OCD and anxiety are handling this. The real pandemic is the overwhelming fear mongering and the damage that does to those of us with varying degrees of mental health. I have anxiety. The more I hear about the COVID pandemic the worse my anxiety gets. I have to physically restrain myself from looking up statistics and reading and then I go to facebook and all my friends are talking about it.
So today I took a break and only talked about it a little bit and wrote instead. It felt like an almost normal day. I should do that more. It’s not like i go running around doing things all the time and now suddenly I can’t anymore. That doesn’t happen around with me LOL I rarely leave the house unless to go to the doctor, so really nothing much has changed! It just FEELS different. I think we will need to be acutely aware of mental health as this COVID crisis continues. There will be less physical contact, less personal connections, less socializing,, less human interaction. People will actively avoid other people. And everyone will undertand why but it’s still going to take a toll on mental health. People will be working from home alone. Meetings will be on the phone….it’s going to be brutal the impact it has. And I haven’t heard anyone talking about that yet.
This COVID is going to change a lot of things.
In the meantime, check out my book and enjoy some smut. LOL That’ll keep ya from going crazy for a little while!
I Love and Need You All!
Michy
